Agatha Tutia



Zappos Intern: Prelude and Prayer

Having some fun in HR's ball pit back in November 2015.

Having some fun in HR's ball pit back in November 2015.

One year ago, I interned as a Business Advisory Services Intern for Grant Thornton in Dallas, TX. I loved working with the people, the mentorship I received was phenomenal, and the company was truly genuine about their values and business. But as the months rolled on, the upcoming offer to stay on became prominent. While I was confidant I'd receive an offer (and I later did), I just couldn't shake this unsteadiness in my heart. During one of our phone calls, my mom frankly stated that I didn't sound happy. It surprised me because I'm generally a happy person, but she was right, deep down inside I knew this career was not for me. I remember crying in my car one night, just completely scared about my future and what I wanted to do, and so I prayed and asked God, What do you want me to do?

And that prayer changed my life.

During that internship, I was in charge of designing a brochure and website for our intern project and I noticed that I was more excited to work on that than auditing password protections and databases. Recalling a quote: "The things you are passionate about are not random, they are your calling." -Fabienne Fredrickson (I've also used this quote in another blog post here), I reflected and prayed about why this was so. I had taken one Graphic Design class the semester prior for funsies, not realsies, yet I loved learning about typography, layouts, colors, types of design, etc. This was what I was passionate about! So I asked God, Should I pursue Graphic Design?


My yes to pursue a totally different career path that was not what I majored in, not nearly as well paid as my offered position, and failed to provide similar job security scared the shit out of me. I was shaking and nervous and I thought my parents would disown me for making such a selfish and untraditional act (Spoiler Alert: They didn't disown me!). But I knew this is what God wanted, and He asked me to trust him and place my faith in him. Finally, peace settled my restless heart.

I decided to tackle a Graphic Design internship the next summer to confirm whether or not this was for me. Maybe God was just messing with me for giggles, but let's be honest, He's the real MVP. Fall semester in the midst of exams and projects, I applied to several companies and received an interview with Zappos in Fabulous Las Vegas. Reading the email, my heart raced and I literally jumped up and down screaming, "I'M GOING TO VEGAS!"

To even have an interview was such an honor and I knew even if I didn't get the position, this moment was proof enough that I was on the right track. Because interviewing with Zappos was such a whirlwind, it's difficult for me to summarize it. All I remember at the top of my head was sharing that I recently made a career change, I was not the best graphic designer, but I was passionate, passionate, passionate to learn and improve myself. A couple days later, I received an email (during my Supply Chain class lol) that I was chosen to intern as a Visual Designer for 6PM, Zappos' sister site. Holy guacamole!

Aggie Awakening 102 AKA doing Catholic stuff in November 2014.

Aggie Awakening 102 AKA doing Catholic stuff in November 2014.

Now, in case you didn't know, I'm Catholic and I love it, sometimes I struggle with it, but it's who I am and it's made me into a kinder person. Anyways, Pope Francis' message of missionary discipleship struck a cord on me a couple of years ago, and I knew that I wasn't meant to stay at St. Mary's, the church I go to at Texas A&M, forever. At some point, my time would be up and hello real world. These past year, I attempted to detach myself and it ended up doing me harm than good. I wouldn't go to Mass every Sunday, I developed poor habits, made even poorer decisions, and my prayer life was basically nonexistent. The struggle was real. So how does this relate to Zappos? Well, it was my relationship with Christ that helped me and guided me into receiving an amazing opportunity in the first place! I did NOT like the person I was becoming and I decided I needed some major changes in my life.

Decorating my new studio apartment in Las Vegas.

Decorating my new studio apartment in Las Vegas.

With the help of my road trip buddy, Roxanna, we came up with a couple of ideas of how to counteract falling into bad habits and be a better Catholic. Before starting my internship, I wanted my soul to be a good place and I decided to reconsecrate myself to Jesus through Mary. This means I read scripture, Pope St. John Paul II's words of wisdom, pray, and journal every day for 33 days (I'll probably write another blog post about what Consecration is all about in more detail). And every night, I write down three things I'm grateful for to help me appreciate the people in my life. It's these good habits I want to develop going into my internship in order to be the best version of myself.

As I begin this new adventure, I truly am thankful for Jesus Christ and everyone who has supported me. And now I ask you, are you happy with yourself? I challenge you to pray silently with God and ask him, What do you want me to do? It just might change your life forever.

Click here to read Week One of my internship.